Good Intentions Lost In Translation

My last post was a poem that was on the depressing side, so I thought this week I’d share a funny story.  Next week, I plan to have a fiction piece for one of Emilio’s photos ready to post.  I’d give you a hint of what it’s about… but I don’t know yet 🙂

Last month, my sons’ cats had their yearly vet visit.  My older son (he’s 12) was concerned about what he thought might be tumors so he talked to the doc about it and they took some fluid to test.  The conclusion:  fatty deposits.  My son asked questions and the doc confirmed that they would shrink in size if the cats lost some weight.

As soon as we got home, my older son announced he was going to take the cats for a walk.  With a raised eyebrow I asked, “A walk?”  He said yes.  So I asked how he planned to do that.  “A leash.”

I stifled a laugh.  I had a feeling I knew how this would go, but I helped him find a harness they couldn’t wiggle out of.  Lizzy was the first victim volunteer.  It was as if she grew ten more legs, but we finally managed to get the harness on her.  As he carried her outside and set her on on the porch, I told him to just let her explore in the yard .  After ten minutes or so, I went outside to find out how the walk was going.  This is what I saw:

"I'm not as into this walking thing as you are..."
“I’m not as into this walking thing as you are…”

When he heard the door open, he turned to me and said, “she won’t move.”  Apparently, his good intentions didn’t translate into feline motivation.  I asked what happened if he picked her up, so he lifted her to standing position and, as soon as he pulled his hands away from her belly, Lizzy fell onto her side again.  We laughed.

He learned a lesson that day:  you can put a cat on a leash, but you can’t make her walk.

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56 thoughts on “Good Intentions Lost In Translation

  1. Nurse Kelly April 20, 2015 / 6:17 AM

    So cute! I tried that when I had a cat a couple of years ago. She would walk around the yard a little and then do the same thing. His heart was in the right place though, and that’s so sweet.

    • jannatwrites April 26, 2015 / 12:57 PM

      I think it might be a little easier when you start them young. These kitties are 6 years old now so they have perfected the art of napping and being lazy. Thanks for stopping by, Nurse Kelly!

  2. nrhatch April 20, 2015 / 6:19 AM

    Haha! We’ve had 3 cats. We trained each of them to “walk” on a leash ~ if they wanted to go outside, the leash was mandatory. All of them loved to walk where THEY wanted to walk when THEY wanted to walk . . . they LEAD and we FOLLOW.

    Sometimes Tigger walks up and down the street to check things out and sometimes he just sits!

    • nrhatch April 20, 2015 / 7:46 AM

      Your son might get some tips from this:

      • jannatwrites April 26, 2015 / 1:01 PM

        That was a cute video! That kitten really did have the human trained pretty well 🙂

    • jannatwrites April 26, 2015 / 12:58 PM

      I think it takes some effort and consistency (neither of which my son exhibits, haha!) Cats do have a tendency to do pretty much as they please 🙂

  3. Tessa April 20, 2015 / 6:41 AM

    Oh I love it! I tried to pull just a collar on my cat and that didn’t work. I couldn’t hold her still and put it on and no one else could go near her.

    • jannatwrites April 26, 2015 / 1:02 PM

      I was afraid to have him take them out in just a collar in case they wriggled out of it. He hasn’t tried “walking” them again yet 🙂

      • Tessa April 26, 2015 / 2:14 PM

        Well I couldn’t even get a collar on her, nothing else was going on for sure. I can’t even hold the sourpuss.

        • jannatwrites April 27, 2015 / 10:40 PM

          Haha, probably best to leave walks alone then 🙂

        • Tessa April 28, 2015 / 8:37 AM

          Oh yeah. No walks. If I want to walk something the dog is always willing. 🙂

  4. Timothy Price April 20, 2015 / 7:03 AM

    Old fat cats! Sounds like kitties and people around our house. Love the photo of the not-gaonna-walk kitty.

    • jannatwrites April 26, 2015 / 1:02 PM

      Thank, Timothy! She really was funny. Lizzy is our most adventurous kitty so I thought she might take to it well. I was wrong 🙂

  5. Sean April 20, 2015 / 7:35 AM

    There is a video of this exact situation. The person puts a harness on his cat and it just lays there. It didn’t matter what you did so it must have something to do with how the harness fits that makes them want to not do anything. Did this happen on your other cats also? I’m sure once the harness was off, Lizzy was fine and back to her normal resting place. At least he didn’t drag her across the yard.

    • jannatwrites April 26, 2015 / 1:04 PM

      Nope, no dragging around – he wouldn’t hurt the kitties! He took his cat, Sammy, out and she actually did walk a little, except she crouched where her belly was almost dragging the ground. She did that when he put an elf sweater on her a couple Christmases ago… yeah, these cats are pretty patient 🙂

  6. Michael April 20, 2015 / 8:12 AM

    I don’t think I could get my cat to walk on a leash, ever. At least you tried, though! 🙂

    • jannatwrites April 26, 2015 / 1:05 PM

      I only had one cat that would tolerate a leash. You never know until you try 🙂

  7. Carol Ann Hoel April 20, 2015 / 9:40 AM

    Cats do not readily welcome a leash, but my Shady liked to play in traffic, so I bought one for him. I think the harness for Lizzy was too confining. The simplest harness is the best, and it should not be too tight. Shady resisted a little, but we got to be great pals on our many walks. He liked to walk, as Nancy says, wherever HE wanted to walk. I followed, with the exception of his desire to play in traffic. I think your son is very caring to be willing to walk his cat to get her exercise. Blessings to you, Janna…

    • jannatwrites April 26, 2015 / 1:07 PM

      She probably didn’t like the harness, but it’s all I had in the house. I didn’t want to do a collar because she might wriggle out of it. I think the cat toys are a better option for them, Carol Ann.

  8. Debbie April 20, 2015 / 11:27 AM

    This is too cute, Janna! Having never owned a cat, I never considered the challenge of taking one on a walk before (though now that I think about it, I’ve NEVER seen a cat walking outside on a leash!!). I wonder what Dallas would do if he met a cat on his walkies?? Interesting thought. There’d probably be fireworks, ha!

    • jannatwrites April 26, 2015 / 1:08 PM

      I bet if you found a cat on a leash, Dallas would think it was a pretty awesome toy you encountered! Sometimes they take the cats out in a pet stroller (it’s totally enclosed.) I’m sure our neighbors think we are strange, haha.

  9. Widdershins April 20, 2015 / 12:29 PM

    Heh, heh …poor lad. He’s going to have to go cat-fishing with chase-y toys … the cat probably thinks walks are for dogs! 😀

    • jannatwrites April 26, 2015 / 1:09 PM

      Haha, I think that’s true- on both counts! We do have some toys inside that we can get them to chase some. I’m trying to cut back on the food a little and they aren’t really on board with that.

  10. mbarkersimpson April 20, 2015 / 2:04 PM

    I laughed so hard at this. Bless your son for trying. That is just so adorable – I can just imagine Lizzy’s indignation!

    • jannatwrites April 26, 2015 / 1:10 PM

      I’m glad you found the humor in this, Mel! It was funny to watch poor Lizzy. She hasn’t been on any more “walks” since then 🙂

  11. Gene Brode, Jr. April 21, 2015 / 2:46 AM

    That’s pretty funny Janna, and I needed a good chuckle.

    • jannatwrites April 26, 2015 / 1:11 PM

      I’m glad you got a needed laugh from this, Gene!

  12. joannesisco April 21, 2015 / 4:43 AM

    LOL! Cats are so uncool sometimes 🙂

    • jannatwrites April 26, 2015 / 1:12 PM

      That’s very true, Kathy! They can be frustrating, but I love kitties 🙂

  13. Björn Rudberg (brudberg) April 23, 2015 / 6:02 AM

    Ha… when I grew up we actually had a cat who loved to walk in a leash (as long as he could go first) we had him when were out walking in the mountains, and when he got too tired he went to sleep in my sisters backpack… alas I how no clue if would ever continued as grown up, because he was run over by a car as a very young cat.

    • jannatwrites April 26, 2015 / 1:13 PM

      Well that was a sad ending to the story, Bjorn! He knew how to travel… walk until you’re tired then hitch a ride 🙂

  14. agjorgenson April 23, 2015 / 6:41 PM

    Been there, done that… or didn’t do that?

    • jannatwrites April 26, 2015 / 1:14 PM

      I guess it depends on how you look at it, Allen 🙂

  15. GodGirl April 24, 2015 / 2:31 PM

    Hahaha, great photo and commentary. So very true!!! They certainly are stubborn, independent creatures… Weight loss? Hmmmph.

    • jannatwrites April 26, 2015 / 1:14 PM

      Thanks, GodGirl. I guess the obesity problem isn’t just for people these days. Luckily they aren’t too bad with the weight yet.

  16. M_Elizabeth April 24, 2015 / 6:49 PM

    Made me laugh Janna! I needed it. You know, somedays I’m just like that cat on a leash.

    • jannatwrites April 26, 2015 / 1:15 PM

      I’m glad you laughed, M! I can be resistant at times, too 🙂

  17. elmediat April 24, 2015 / 6:54 PM

    Tried that long ago with the oldest cat. Cats think in three dimensions ( actually at least six ) – there are no straight lines. 🙂

    • jannatwrites April 26, 2015 / 1:16 PM

      Haha, walking a cat is definitely different than with a dog (which explains why it’s rare to see them out on a leash 🙂 ) Thanks for stoppinng by, Elmediat!

  18. philosophermouseofthehedge April 28, 2015 / 1:35 PM

    Rolling with laughter over this. We have several different types of harnesses for RC Cat. Husband decided she needed to be able to go outdoors and enjoy the breeze and nice weather – without climbing to the top of the highest point in the area or making a break for total freedom. She managed to get out of the test runs of most, but crazykfarms.com (which is an interesting place/farm/rescue not far from us) hand makes one similar to yours – and the had a training video. There was a cat on CBS that walked on one of theirs. But RC looked a lot like your sideways cat indoors. We did carry her out and she was enthralled and actually walked around on a long leash…but also managed to almost pull out of the vest/harness. (That’s what tails are for right? Emergency cat handles) So much for exercise.(I think there’s a similar picture of her sideways somewhere in archives). She’s got long hair: tends to be hot and it’s hard to tighten up the vest/harness. Luckily Molly has been motivating her to jog around the house.
    Loved this post!!!!

    • jannatwrites May 2, 2015 / 8:15 PM

      I’m glad you liked the humor in this, Phil. Had to laugh at the emergency rescue (tail) 🙂 We do what we have to, right? RC Cat sounds like a feline Houdini. I was afraid we’d run into that as well, but luckily no one tried to escape and all was well.

  19. pattisj May 27, 2015 / 9:47 PM

    His heart was in the right place, trying to help her lose weight the best he knew how. Thanks for the smile. 🙂

    • jannatwrites July 21, 2015 / 11:00 PM

      Thanks, Carol Ann. I’m starting to see glimpses of “me”. Hope you are doing well!

      • Carol Ann Hoel July 22, 2015 / 7:54 PM

        I’m doing fine. Keep smiling. You will emerge from trouble like a butterfly. You will be stronger and better. Blessings…

        • jannatwrites July 27, 2015 / 10:59 PM

          I suppose I will be stronger, Carol Ann… it’s just really hard to see this when everything is bearing down. Time will tell 🙂

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