The convenience store sat in the middle of nowhere, halfway between my past and future.
“I need cigarettes,” you’d said.
I asked for Cheetos; the puffy kind, not the crunchy ones.
“I’ll see what I can do.”
The car idled. I felt like I’d drown under the July Arizona sun.
You slid into the seat, shifted the Honda in gear, and tossed snacks and cigarettes at me. Sweat rolled down your sideburns.
“Everything okay, Daddy?”
You checked the rearview mirror but didn’t answer.
Your jawline tensed. Engine revved, dashed white lines blurred. I knew.
I’d follow deep as you go.
~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-
This is my response to Lance’s 100 Word Song. It’s pretty much what it sounds like: he provides a song and we write a story in exactly 100 words inspired by that song. This week, the song is Deep As You Go by October Project. (Don’t ask me how I got a father-daughter robbery getaway from that song!)
If it sounds like fun, I hope you’ll consider joining in – click the robot image at left to see Lance’s site and his take on the 100 word song.
Have a great Wednesday, all!
Love your story Janna, Impressive as always !
Thanks for reading, Lala! I hope you’ll submit a story this week… it’s been a while since you’ve linked up 🙂
What a terrible father . . . buying her junk food and cigarettes and leaving her idling in the getaway car. 😎
Well, it’s even worse because he “paid” for everything with the five-finger discount. The cigs are his, but he couldn’t hold them and outrun the law at the same time 🙂 (She’s underage, though I left her age open to interpretation…. with the use of “Daddy”, I was thinking twelve or under…) Thanks for reading, Nancy! (Glad my dad always paid for stuff with money, but I do remember wishing he could drive a little faster.)
Yikes, what an awful example this father is showing his daughter! Thievery?? Nothing like making memories that last a lifetime, huh?!
Haha, yeah, he’s not showing her the right way. But maybe by living this way, she’ll steer in that direction? Thanks for reading, Debbie!
Great little story! ♥
Thanks for reading, Kathy!
This is great, Janna. I could see an entire movie out of this 100 words! 🙂
Thanks, Dianne 🙂
Great opening line.
Always crunchy! All the little detail you use make thing seem so real.
Running on empty, are they? (You could run a contest for what background music/songs go with your writings)
I’d hoped this would come across as real (not easy with 100 words… I had to cut quite a bit off this one.) I like Lance’s music challenges because most of the time, it involves songs I’m not familiar with. Broadens my horizons, in a way. Thanks for stopping by, Phil!
Great story….it really does seem like the introduction to a great novel.
Thanks, Susan! Glad it captured your interest.
Yup, we gotto learn them youngens while they’re still young!
She’s still too young to drive, but give her time 🙂 Thanks for reading, Eric!
Music please. La la la Deep as you go, Dad… Cool! Blessings to you, Janna…
I’m glad you stopped by to read it, Carol Ann!
Thanks for this! Did you have a hard time stopping at 100 words? It seems that this story is just getting revved up!
It actually did take some work to get it down to 100 words, Allen. At 101, I thought I might have to scrap the idea and try again, but I finally got it to work. There’s probably more story to tell here… maybe someday I can get around to telling it 🙂
Well, that would be quite the childhood! I love the unique way you responded to the prompt. Great imagination.
Thanks, C.C. The song was obviously about romantic love, so I did want to focus on a different type of love. Glad you stopped by to read it!
What an interesting idea! Writers always need some push to get the creative juices going.
A prompt does help, doesn’t it, Ly? 🙂
It was funny as I was reading it, it brought back the times when my parents would go into the store for a minute and leave us kids in the car. That may explain some things lol. I do agree with others that this was too short but limitations are a struggle at times. You have a knack for bringing the visualization to our mind. thanks
Well, if they ran to the car and peeled out onto the interstate, I think it does explain a lot, Sean 🙂 Oh, I definitely could’ve expanded this (and trimming to exactly 100 was a challenge!) Thanks for reading. Hope you have a nice weekend!
You do these fringe character so well. When Janna T gonna write book?
Thanks, Mel! A book… well, uh, I have one done (that needs a complete run through) and I’m working on the one that I did the nine month serial on Trifecta… at the rate I’m going, maybe by 2025 🙂
I think Darlene def deserves a novel. 🙂 grind it out lady!!
Thanks for the encouragement 🙂
I liked your treatment of the prompt, and the way you wove snippets of lyrics into the story. It worked wonderfully.
Thanks, Tara! I appreciate you taking time to read it.
Not familiar with the song, but that’s a cool concept, and I like your story.
Thanks, Patti. I’m glad you stopped by to read it 🙂
I love where you went with this! Brilliant! I would not have gotten father-daughter out of the song, either, which makes it that much more interesting.
Thanks, Christine! The father/daughter was a stretch, but I didn’t want to go the obvious route 🙂