His Choice

The last strains

of sunlight


in the corners,

grasping every available

point of refraction.

She slid her fingertips

Along the glass


if this was all

     there ever was.

          Or could be.

An extension of her,

the glass

warmed to her touch.

Fresh tears

surged, besieged-

she knew “I do”

had  been said.

Snifter of amber

consoled, cajoled

while he toasted

     his life

     with Elizabeth.


Please note that this is fiction.  My husband has not chosen to marry a woman named Elizabeth (to my knowledge, at least :)) and I’m not pining for some man who has made such a choice.  The truth about this this piece is that it’s my response to the Trifecta weekend challenge.  Here’s how the Trifecta editors presented it:

For this weekend’s challenge, we’d like you to read the 33 words below and then add 33 of your own words to move the story along. Have a great weekend and good luck!

The last strains of sunlight lingered in the corners, grasping every available point of refraction. She slid her fingertips along the glass wondering if this was all there ever was. Or could be.

So, the italicized portion of the poem is the paragraph provided by Trifecta (I didn’t change any words or punctuation, so I think it still counts!) and the last portion is my continuation, in 33 words.

If you want to try your hand at the challenge, check out Trifecta’s site by clicking on the Tricycle picture.  There you will find all the info you need to give it a go.  Thanks for reading!


50 thoughts on “His Choice

  1. pattisj September 7, 2012 / 10:50 AM

    You make this look so easy, Janna.

    • jannatwrites September 7, 2012 / 10:46 PM

      Thanks for the nice compliment, Patti 🙂

  2. Ruby Manchanda September 7, 2012 / 11:43 AM

    My heart goes out to her. You gave her character a lot of strength

    • jannatwrites September 7, 2012 / 10:46 PM

      I think she’ll make it through just fine. She might have a headache the next day, but that too, will pass 🙂 Thanks for reading, Ruby!

  3. philosophermouseofthehedge September 7, 2012 / 11:49 AM

    Like the idea of sunlight grasping…like it’s trying to hang around and help.
    Then the “amber” shows up.
    Then that word “toasted” with all the meanings
    Nicely done!

    • jannatwrites September 7, 2012 / 10:49 PM

      I enjoyed reading your comment, Phil. The grasping sunlight wasn’t my wording, but I liked it, too, It’s funny you should mention ‘toasted’ when I wrote it, I thought it was funny that while he toasted to his future, she was getting toasted herself 🙂

  4. OldDogNewTits September 7, 2012 / 12:46 PM

    I really like it. Perfect interpretation of “the glass.” Perfect.

    • jannatwrites September 7, 2012 / 10:50 PM

      Thanks so much for stopping by to read it, ODNT. I’m glad you enjoyed 🙂

  5. J. P. Cabit September 7, 2012 / 1:30 PM

    Woah. Misread that last part and thought that your husband actually ran away with a woman named Elizabeth. Thanks for the scare! (I almost felt really sorry for you!)

    • jannatwrites September 7, 2012 / 10:52 PM

      Hahaha! There’d be a whole lot more bitter in this if he’d done that. I did have an ex back in high school dump me for an Elizabeth…but I’m pretty sure they didn’t get married. Glad you stopped by, Seph 🙂

  6. Michael September 7, 2012 / 1:48 PM

    Wow, that was really good. I felt so sad for her.

    • jannatwrites September 7, 2012 / 10:54 PM

      I appreciate you reading it, Michael. It would be a sad situation, so I’m awfully glad it’s fiction.

    • jannatwrites September 7, 2012 / 10:55 PM

      Thanks, Kenya! I appreciate you stopping by to read my entry. (Your character makes a better choice by stepping away from the glass :))

  7. Carl D'Agostino September 7, 2012 / 3:28 PM

    Well that’s good. Elizabeth was a real witch anyway once you get to know her.

    • jannatwrites September 7, 2012 / 11:00 PM

      I guess that’s some consolation 🙂 Glad you stopped by, Carl.

  8. Renada Styles September 7, 2012 / 3:45 PM

    i loved how you turned this into a poetic piece, and it all meshed together beautifully. it gave me a pang to read it.

    • jannatwrites September 7, 2012 / 11:02 PM

      Thanks, Renada. I tried to leave Trifecta’s wording in tact, but I didn’t have enough words to convey what I wanted to. I’m glad you enjoyed it 🙂

  9. diannegray September 7, 2012 / 4:38 PM

    This is lovely. The sunlight ‘grasping every available point of refraction’. Fantastic 🙂

    • jannatwrites September 7, 2012 / 11:03 PM

      I wish I could claim that line, but that was part of Trifecta’s wording 🙂 Thanks for stopping by to read it, Dianne!

      • diannegray September 7, 2012 / 11:23 PM

        Do’h! I was sure it was yours 😀

        • jannatwrites September 8, 2012 / 7:31 PM

          Ha! If only it were my own 🙂

  10. Imelda September 7, 2012 / 4:53 PM

    Oh so sad. But nicely written as usual. 🙂

    • jannatwrites September 7, 2012 / 11:05 PM

      Thanks, Imelda. It is definitely a sad scene.

    • jannatwrites September 7, 2012 / 11:06 PM

      Thanks, Kelly! I’m glad you liked it 🙂

  11. nrhatch September 7, 2012 / 7:35 PM

    I am delighted with this FICTIONAL real life drama, Janna.

    Remind your husband as often as possible that YOU are a KEEPER! Elizabeth doesn’t stand a chance! 😉

    • jannatwrites September 7, 2012 / 11:08 PM

      I’m happy it’s fictional, too 🙂 I’ll be sure to remind my husband daily about how awesome I am (like when I leave my dishes in the sink) – I’m sure he’ll agree!

  12. natalieamatera September 7, 2012 / 11:49 PM

    What a stunning interpretation. Beautiful, lonely, and sad with a backbone of steel, just like the lady left behind.

    • jannatwrites September 8, 2012 / 7:32 PM

      Thanks for stopping by to read it, Natalie. I’m glad you enjoyed it!

  13. Lumdog September 8, 2012 / 3:37 AM

    Yes, this is very sad. Beautifully written.

    • jannatwrites September 8, 2012 / 7:33 PM

      Maybe my next story won’t be such a downer…then again, maybe it will 🙂 Thanks for reading, Lumdog!

  14. Tina September 8, 2012 / 10:22 AM

    Sad, but lyrical. Perfect poetry!

  15. BettyRants September 8, 2012 / 12:00 PM

    JannaT, you consistently write the most beautiful pieces, and this one just serves to prove my point. Your use of language, today both yours and Trifecta’s, is truly masterful. Whether using thirty-three words or three hundred thirty-three, your characters come alive and touch the reader with their genuine humanity. We are able to identify, to empathize, to love or hate every character that you create. It is a joy and an inspiration to read your writing.
    Thank you for sharing it as often as you do,
    (And I, too, am glad this is fiction for you!)
    Excellent entry!
    Peace and light,
    Amy @BettyRanta

    • jannatwrites September 8, 2012 / 7:53 PM

      I am humbled by your praise, Betty. There are so many talented writers, and sometimes I struggle with doubt. Many of my stories are faith-based, and I know they won’t appeal to everyone, but as a writer, it’s a pleasure to know that my characters mean something to someone else.

      I’m glad you have enjoyed my stories. I appreciate you taking time to read them, and certainly for taking the time to share your thoughts 🙂

  16. Tessa September 8, 2012 / 7:59 PM

    Poignant, such depth of feeling imparted in such few words. Loved this Janna!

    • jannatwrites September 8, 2012 / 8:03 PM

      Thanks, Tessa. So glad you liked this one!

  17. pattyabr September 8, 2012 / 8:55 PM

    nice flow. you incorporated it well.

    • jannatwrites September 9, 2012 / 11:44 PM

      Thanks, Patty. I’m glad you stopped by to read it.

  18. braintomahawk September 9, 2012 / 8:04 AM

    I really enjoyed how you broke down the lines even within themselves.
    And glass, I kept thinking window (and used it that way), you put in IN the hand. Perfect.

    • jannatwrites September 9, 2012 / 11:51 PM

      I’m glad you liked this one, Braintomahawk. I wanted to be true to the prompt and keep it in paragraph form, but this idea wouldn’t get out of my head!

  19. Amy Harrison September 9, 2012 / 1:28 PM

    This is a fantastic poem 🙂 It flowed so well 😀

    • jannatwrites September 9, 2012 / 11:56 PM

      Thanks, Amy. I appreciate you stopping by to read it!

  20. Sandra September 10, 2012 / 7:47 AM

    Beautiful writing, Janna! You really make it look so easy. The words you choose bring so much eloquence to this sad story. (I sat out for this Trifextra, but I’m on my way to check out the new one for the week!)

    • jannatwrites September 11, 2012 / 7:38 AM

      I didn’t see a link for you, so I wondered. If I don’t get caught up better on blog reading, I may sit out the weekend one. The prompts are just so hard to resist, though 🙂

      Thanks for reading this one, I appreciate it!

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