Without Wings

A boy of seven

Perches atop the roof,

Cape flapping in the wind.


Widowed mother sits.

Boyfriend on bended knee,

Proposes marriage again.


They both trust;

Boy breaks his arm,

Mom says ‘yes’.


This 33-word piece is in response to the Trifecta weekend challenge:  Forty-three years ago today, Neil Armstrong became the first person to ever walk on the moon.  In celebration of Moon Day we want you to write 33 words about someone who took a giant leap.  It can mean whatever you’d like, just make sure you write exactly 33 words.


We all take figurative and literal leaps.  Sometimes, we’re rewarded, but sometimes we fall short (which can be disastrous on those literal leaps, as any young super hero can attest to :))

Just last night, I took a leap and started preparing my post concluding Ellie’s story (in response to the big Trifecta challenge from a couple weeks ago.)  I attempted proactivity and failed by accidentally publishing (oops!)  I deleted it and the entry will be posted ‘for real’ on Monday.  My apologies to subscribers who received the notification last night.

Procrastination waits for me with open arms.  I’ll see if I can resist its familiar charms.


48 thoughts on “Without Wings

  1. Gina July 20, 2012 / 12:04 PM

    They both trusted indeed. I’m happy for the widow…end of loneliness. The harsh lesson in reality that the seven year old learned that day pains me.

    • jannatwrites July 20, 2012 / 11:11 PM

      I’m sure having a broken arm isn’t any fun, but he learned from the experience. Thanks for your comment, Gina!

  2. newwhitebear July 20, 2012 / 12:09 PM

    I read your ghost post but i found only an error 404 not found.

    Nice e lovely this poetry.

    • jannatwrites July 20, 2012 / 11:13 PM

      ‘Ghost post; – I like that. I wondered if it would go through on the email since I deleted it so quickly. I appreciate you taking time to read and comment, Newwhitebear!

  3. Widdershins July 20, 2012 / 12:34 PM

    Sometimes you breaks your arm and sometime you gets the ring … all part of the adventure!

    • jannatwrites July 20, 2012 / 11:17 PM

      Yep, thems the breaks.

      I know, that was bad, but I couldn’t help it! We’ll never feel the joy of success or the pain of missing our mark if we never try. Thanks for visiting, Widdershins.

  4. Tahlitha Chadwick July 20, 2012 / 1:39 PM

    Beautifully written, Janna. Our leaps and bounds are always worth it.

    • jannatwrites July 20, 2012 / 11:18 PM

      Thanks for reading, Talitha. If we never leap, we miss out on a big part of life.

  5. philosophermouseofthehedge July 20, 2012 / 4:13 PM

    What a great story! I’m always impressed how you create such vivid images with so few words. Several universal themes possible here. Trust, maturity, risk nothing-gain nothing, and others –
    Right now, I’ll go with the Look before you leap

    • jannatwrites July 20, 2012 / 11:20 PM

      I appreciate your kind words, Phil. Looking is a good thing, as long as we finally do leap 🙂

  6. uneven steven July 20, 2012 / 4:32 PM

    Great juxtaposing of the two – good ending saying yes even though you know we all get hurt in the end ….

    • jannatwrites July 20, 2012 / 11:23 PM

      Thanks for reading, Steven! You’re right, pain is unavoidable, but the chance of finding joy makes the risk worth taking.

    • jannatwrites July 20, 2012 / 11:24 PM

      Thanks, Patty. I appreciate you reading it!

    • jannatwrites July 20, 2012 / 11:24 PM

      Thanks, Ruby! I’m glad you stopped by.

  7. colonialist July 21, 2012 / 12:25 AM

    Very well crafted! I love the way it leaves one wondering whether the results of the trust are mirrored or contrasting.

    • jannatwrites July 21, 2012 / 10:54 AM

      Thanks for reading and sharing your thoughts, Colonialist! I’m glad you liked the ambiguous ending.

  8. Celeste July 21, 2012 / 12:41 AM

    Nostalgic… the broken arm will mend.

    • jannatwrites July 21, 2012 / 10:54 AM

      Thanks for reading, Celeste. Broken bones do heal…the emotional hurts are a bit more complex.

  9. GodGirl July 21, 2012 / 3:59 AM

    Oh wow. This is awesome, I really love it. So much power in the images presented here – and massive depth in so few words. My heart kind of flips in two different directions in the final two lines – it certainly packs a beautiful punch!
    Some writing just stays with you, and as I read this I know your work here is in that category.

    • jannatwrites July 21, 2012 / 10:56 AM

      Thanks for the huge compliment, GodGirl. This is basically a product of me being unable to choose the literal or figurative leap 🙂 I’m an optimist, so I like to think that in the end, some sense of peace and happiness is achieved for both.

  10. vivinfrance July 21, 2012 / 6:05 AM

    I misread the middle stanza: I read the first full stop as a comma, and hoped Boyfriend wasn’t too heavy!

    • jannatwrites July 21, 2012 / 10:58 AM

      That’s funny, Vivinfrance! I have a feeling a boyfriend on her knee would cause much discomfort 🙂

  11. Marie July 21, 2012 / 9:30 AM

    I think we may have a winner here! Ding-ding-ding! Very impressive…

    • jannatwrites July 21, 2012 / 10:59 AM

      Thanks so much for reading, and for your kind comment, Marie. There are so many compelling entries, I don’t envy the editors having to choose.

  12. jesterqueen (@jesterqueen) July 21, 2012 / 12:31 PM

    Uh-oh. I hope Mom’s marriage doesn’t work like boy’s leap. My Dad used to jump off picnic tables similarly clad.

    • jannatwrites July 21, 2012 / 11:40 PM

      I hope your Dad did that as a child, Jester Queen 🙂 I like to think her marriage will be fulfilling, but these days, it’s hard to tell.

    • jannatwrites July 21, 2012 / 11:41 PM

      I think a lot of kids tried the Superman thing – just because it looked so cool, it would be awesome if we could do it, too. Glad you stopped by, Kelly.

  13. Jenna Farelyn (@frelle) July 21, 2012 / 1:36 PM

    beautiful job and great juxtaposition. Also? My dad jumped off the roof of the garage about that same age and broke his collarbone. Wearing a cape.

    • jannatwrites July 21, 2012 / 11:43 PM

      I shouldn’t laugh at his pain, but the way you stated it just struck me as funny. Thanks for the laugh, Frelle 🙂

  14. Imelda July 21, 2012 / 2:33 PM

    I like the juxtaposition of mother and child taking a leap. I hope the mother does not break her arm or anything though. 🙂

    • jannatwrites July 21, 2012 / 11:45 PM

      Ha! I think her heart would be more likely to be broken (and that takes longer to heal than an arm :)) Maybe she would do better jumping off the roof? (only kidding) Thanks for reading and for the laugh, Imelda!

  15. Sandra July 21, 2012 / 9:44 PM

    Nice! Very creative take on the prompt. I like the intertwined stories!

    • jannatwrites July 21, 2012 / 11:45 PM

      Thanks, Sandra! I appreciate you stopping by to read it.

  16. trifectawriting July 22, 2012 / 2:01 PM

    Thanks for linking up with Trifextra! What’s wrong with me that my first thought was that the kid’s arm will heal, but that mom is still jumping every day. Anyway, lots of room for thoughts here. Good work!

    • jannatwrites July 22, 2012 / 3:39 PM

      Hehehe….yes, parents do jump everyday. Sometimes we land on our feet…sometimes not 🙂

  17. Sharp Little Pencil July 23, 2012 / 8:48 AM

    Janna, I didn’t make it in time for the challenge… again! Your take on the boy and the widow – is it his mother? I’m thinking of my sister, widowed at 32, whose son was one of those who would jump off anything, sure he was immortal. Then he jumped into drugs and almost found out the hard way that he sure as hell ISN’T immortal.

    This story threads together nicely, and each will profit from their experience! Amy

    • jannatwrites July 23, 2012 / 9:16 AM

      I’m sorry you missed the challenge again…maybe next week?

      Yes, the widow is supposed to be his mother (I really needed another word or two on this one :)) I hope your nephew got his life back on track. It must’ve been a horrible experience for all involved. Drugs are scary. I have a cousin who is playing with fire where that’s concerned. He survived Afghanistan twice, and we’re praying he survives this, too.

      Thanks for stopping by and sharing how this poem relates to your own life, Amy.

  18. Diane Turner July 28, 2012 / 8:21 PM

    Love the dual perspectives. Hope Mom doesn’t get her heart broken in her endeavor. A broken arm is enough for one family. Excellent piece.

    • jannatwrites July 28, 2012 / 11:08 PM

      Thank you for taking the time to read and share your thoughts, Diane. I hope her heart stays intact as well….it’s harder to mend than an arm, anyway 🙂

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