Prophecy of Three

Yesterday morning’s conversation weighed heavily on my mind.  He had shared an eerie dream with me.  He calmly explained how I would deny knowing him and he would die soon after.  I assured him it was just a dream; I wouldn’t let that happen.  But he swore I would indeed abandon him; repeating this prophecy three times to me.  I refused to believe I would deny the truth to save myself.

Later that day, I watched Loudas lead an angry crowd right to us.  I stepped to the side when the accusers approached.  I followed far behind as they dragged him away.  I listened as they read the bogus charges.  I kept my silence, wrapped in a cloak of anonymity.  I closed my eyes and remembered the words I spoke that morning:  I promise I will not abandon you.  I will die with you if I have to.

A girl recognized me as an accomplice.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I said.

I left, but another girl placed me with him.

“I don’t know the man,” I insisted.

More accusers surrounded me.

“I don’t know the man!”  I shouted over the sea of murmurs.

A rooster crowed.

A painful combination of guilt and revulsion at my own cowardice churned in my stomach.  The weight of what I had done threatened to destroy me.  Just as Jesus had predicted, I denied him three times.  I pushed through the crowd toward the gates.

“Peter, wait!”  Simon called after me.

Outside, I slumped to the sidewalk and my bitter tears soaked the ground where Jesus had walked hours before.

This morning, I got word that Loudas hanged himself.  Lucky fool.  I am left to witness Jesus’ crucifixion, if I can muster the courage to go.


(Fictional account based on Matthew 26:31-75)

I’m fascinated by events in the Bible, especially those involving people who encountered Jesus.  So when the folks at Trifecta put out the challenge below, the first thing I thought of was Peter denying Jesus.  I could only imagine the shock he felt when he realized that he fulfilled Jesus’ prophecy.

This is my entry in the second of a trio of Trefecta challenges this week (they are celebrating their 33rd challenge in a big way!)  Here is the challenge:

“Write a 33-333 word response to the following quote: “What I tell you three times is true.” by Lewis Carroll.  You do not have to use the actual quote in your response, but you may if you wish.”

If you want to read more about it, or give one (or all) of the challenges a try, click the tricycle picture to check out their site.


52 thoughts on “Prophecy of Three

  1. GodGirl June 25, 2012 / 8:39 PM

    In reading this I felt like I really entered Peter’s head – the conviction he felt that he wouldn’t deny Jesus, followed by the ease in which he did. You’ve really captured his (and in a sense our) humanity here.
    The ending is great too – I really feel his defeat, and the fearful, onimous atmosphere pre-crucifixion.
    Well written! (once again)

    • jannatwrites June 25, 2012 / 10:06 PM

      You “got” what I attempted to do here, GodGirl. I wanted to tell Peter’s story because he is our story, too (humanity, as you mentioned.) The difference is that he failed at Christ’s side, but Jesus has already died for our sins. Thanks for taking the time to read and share your thoughts!

      • GodGirl June 26, 2012 / 3:03 AM

        Well you definitely succeeded. In the past I’ve wondered how Peter could break his promise to Jesus so easily, but we do the same in so many ways.
        Very true – we already have his redemption for all we’ve done against him 🙂

        • jannatwrites June 26, 2012 / 7:50 PM

          Your comment about wondering how Peter could break his promise so easily struck me because I have wondered the same thing…followed by “I wouldn’t have done that.” Of course it’s easy to say that when I’m not confronted by an angry mob bent on killing anyone tied to Jesus 🙂 Reality is, I probably would’ve been too chicken to even watch from a distance!

        • GodGirl June 27, 2012 / 2:55 AM

          It would’ve been an intense time – when you think about it, it’s understandable he cracked under the pressure. I guess we face different pressures… and as you said, thankfully the price has already been paid for our betrayal.

        • jannatwrites June 27, 2012 / 5:43 AM

          We do face different pressures, indeed. Thanks for your thoughtful comments on this, GodGirl…I’ve enjoyed the discussion 🙂

  2. Cameron June 25, 2012 / 8:57 PM

    The misery in the finale is so achingly human.

    • jannatwrites June 25, 2012 / 10:07 PM

      Thanks for reading and ‘feeling’ it, Cameron!

  3. Writer Jobs June 25, 2012 / 9:08 PM

    Another nice post today thanks. I really enjoyed reading it very much. Have a great day.

    Enjoy writing? Join Us Today!

    Writers Wanted

    • jannatwrites June 25, 2012 / 10:11 PM

      Thanks, Tahlitha. Poor Peter did have a terrible heartache.

  4. Annabelle June 26, 2012 / 5:20 AM

    Interesting to read this story from such an immediate human point of view. Well done.

    • jannatwrites June 26, 2012 / 7:51 PM

      Thanks for stopping by to read it, Annabelle.

    • jannatwrites June 26, 2012 / 7:51 PM

      Thanks, Phil. Thanks for stopping by to read the story!

  5. Hannah Gosselin June 26, 2012 / 8:29 AM

    Poignant retelling…well done…good instance of three to tell!

    • jannatwrites June 26, 2012 / 7:52 PM

      Thanks, Hannah. I planned to create something ‘new’ but couldn’t get this story out of my head 🙂

      • Hannah Gosselin June 27, 2012 / 8:54 AM

        Often times this means it needs to be written so kudos!!

  6. newwhitebear June 26, 2012 / 9:27 AM

    Nice post. A light and soft touch crosses our mind

    • jannatwrites June 26, 2012 / 7:53 PM

      Thanks, Newwhitebear. I appreciate your visit 🙂

  7. vanhaydu June 26, 2012 / 2:11 PM

    Loved it…especially the way you ended.


    • jannatwrites June 26, 2012 / 7:55 PM

      Thanks, Vanhaydu. I’m glad you enjoyed the familiar story!

  8. Tessa June 26, 2012 / 4:31 PM

    Wow! Janna that was beautifully written. Good use of the prompt!

  9. Eric Alagan June 26, 2012 / 5:16 PM

    Denial and Betrayal comes only from family and friends – as strangers cannot betray us. Everyone who betrayed or denied us – was family or friend.

    • jannatwrites June 26, 2012 / 7:56 PM

      I hadn’t thought about it, Eric, but you’re right. If we aren’t emotionally connected to a person, their actions don’t impact us at all.

  10. Linda Vernon June 26, 2012 / 9:18 PM

    This as really powerful. Well done Jannat!

  11. jesterqueen (@jesterqueen) June 27, 2012 / 7:53 AM

    Loved the use of Loudas for Judas. I don’t know much Biblical, so I assume that’s one of those cool names that has a lot of forms.

    • jannatwrites June 27, 2012 / 7:56 PM

      I have to admit, I found Loudas after an internet search….Judas was too obvious. Glad you liked the switch, Jester Queen.

  12. Sandra June 27, 2012 / 8:38 AM

    Great response to the prompt! His internal struggle with guilt and betrayal came across brilliantly.

    • jannatwrites June 27, 2012 / 8:00 PM

      Brilliantly? I wouldn’t say so, but you make me blush, Sandra. Thanks for taking time to read it and share your thoughts.

      • Sandra June 27, 2012 / 9:36 PM

        I hope you don’t think that’s a bad choice of word for the story?! I just admire your story writing. It’s something I don’t have a good grasp on, so your creations are really enjoyable to me. =)

        • jannatwrites June 27, 2012 / 9:38 PM

          I’m flattered by your word choice (and overly critical of myself at times.) I’m glad you enjoy my stories, but don’t sell yourself short. You writing is beautiful. I like your prompt writing, but your letters of muse are so engaging too (equally good, just different styles.)

        • Sandra June 27, 2012 / 9:45 PM

          Oh, good. Thank you, Janna. Yes, you are right. Different styles. I’m much more comfortable with my Letters, and more out-of-my-elements with the prompt writing. But I like the challenges when I get inspired. (Unfortunately won’t be doing this week’s. Boo).

        • jannatwrites June 27, 2012 / 9:54 PM

          Sorry you won’t be doing them this week, Sandra. I did two of the three and I don’t think I’m going to get through reading the other entries. Not enough time.

    • jannatwrites June 27, 2012 / 8:01 PM

      Thanks for stopping by to read the story, TikkTok!

  13. Andrea June 27, 2012 / 2:35 PM

    Great use of the prompt! I wouldn’t have thought of that! And just think, maybe God put that on your heart to write bc of other Trifecta writers stopping by!

    • jannatwrites June 27, 2012 / 8:07 PM

      Maybe, Andrea. I’ve done a couple Bible stories as Trifecta responses, each time unsure of what the response would be. Each time, fellow writers have responded well. Thanks for your visit, Andrea!

  14. Amanda June 28, 2012 / 4:30 AM

    I’ve known that story all my life, but I didn’t immediately recognize it in this context. I guess I never put myself into the story before – reading your take made it seem more personal somehow.

    • jannatwrites July 1, 2012 / 5:24 PM

      Thanks for reading the story, Amanda. I had hoped the story wouldn’t be too obvious until the end.

  15. Renada Styles June 28, 2012 / 6:15 AM

    you retold the old story very well. i can’t see a better suiting tale for the offered prompt.

    • jannatwrites July 1, 2012 / 5:27 PM

      Thanks, Renada. I appreciate you stopping by to read it!

  16. rosemary mint June 28, 2012 / 10:41 PM

    What a creative take on the prompt! Fantastic idea.

    • jannatwrites July 1, 2012 / 5:28 PM

      Thanks, Rosemary! I guess it was cheating, but nothing “original” came to mind.

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