As I wrote my last post, I wondered if I discounted what the speaker had to say simply because it didn’t fit with what I do right now. It crossed my mind that I didn’t want to hear that writing every day was a must because I can’t do it at this point in my life. I thought that maybe I discounted the five ideas a day and the benefits of morning writing because I do neither of them.
Basically, I wondered if the mask of denial blinded me.
This wouldn’t be the first time that denial caused me to miss the obvious. I’ve ignored signs that a friend could not be trusted because it hurt to accept the truth. Of course denying the betrayal only hurt worse when it couldn’t be disregarded any longer. It didn’t help that everyone saw it but me.
Just this weekend, I did my best to deny the signs that I came down with the crud everyone else had last week. I willed myself to believe that my shivers were a product of a drafty house. My upset stomach was caused by food that didn’t agree with me. The headache and body aches weren’t happening.
But they are. I can’t deny any longer that I am sick…and more than a little cranky. Here’s hoping my sense of humor returns in my next post.
My health and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. (Psalm 73:26)
I hope everyone stays healthy.
P.S.: For now, I’m not changing my writing process, but will keep the suggestions in mind for the future!