Skip to content

His Choice

September 7, 2012

The last strains

of sunlight

lingered

in the corners,

grasping every available

point of refraction.

She slid her fingertips

Along the glass

wondering

if this was all

     there ever was.

          Or could be.

An extension of her,

the glass

warmed to her touch.

Fresh tears

surged, besieged-

she knew “I do”

had  been said.

Snifter of amber

consoled, cajoled

while he toasted

     his life

     with Elizabeth.

~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-~~~-

Please note that this is fiction.  My husband has not chosen to marry a woman named Elizabeth (to my knowledge, at least :) ) and I’m not pining for some man who has made such a choice.  The truth about this this piece is that it’s my response to the Trifecta weekend challenge.  Here’s how the Trifecta editors presented it:

For this weekend’s challenge, we’d like you to read the 33 words below and then add 33 of your own words to move the story along. Have a great weekend and good luck!

The last strains of sunlight lingered in the corners, grasping every available point of refraction. She slid her fingertips along the glass wondering if this was all there ever was. Or could be.

So, the italicized portion of the poem is the paragraph provided by Trifecta (I didn’t change any words or punctuation, so I think it still counts!) and the last portion is my continuation, in 33 words.

If you want to try your hand at the challenge, check out Trifecta’s site by clicking on the Tricycle picture.  There you will find all the info you need to give it a go.  Thanks for reading!

50 Comments leave one →
  1. September 7, 2012 10:50 AM

    You make this look so easy, Janna.

  2. September 7, 2012 11:43 AM

    My heart goes out to her. You gave her character a lot of strength

    • September 7, 2012 10:46 PM

      I think she’ll make it through just fine. She might have a headache the next day, but that too, will pass :) Thanks for reading, Ruby!

  3. September 7, 2012 11:49 AM

    Like the idea of sunlight grasping…like it’s trying to hang around and help.
    Then the “amber” shows up.
    Then that word “toasted” with all the meanings
    Nicely done!

    • September 7, 2012 10:49 PM

      I enjoyed reading your comment, Phil. The grasping sunlight wasn’t my wording, but I liked it, too, It’s funny you should mention ‘toasted’ when I wrote it, I thought it was funny that while he toasted to his future, she was getting toasted herself :)

  4. September 7, 2012 12:46 PM

    I really like it. Perfect interpretation of “the glass.” Perfect.

    • September 7, 2012 10:50 PM

      Thanks so much for stopping by to read it, ODNT. I’m glad you enjoyed :)

  5. September 7, 2012 1:30 PM

    Woah. Misread that last part and thought that your husband actually ran away with a woman named Elizabeth. Thanks for the scare! (I almost felt really sorry for you!)

    • September 7, 2012 10:52 PM

      Hahaha! There’d be a whole lot more bitter in this if he’d done that. I did have an ex back in high school dump me for an Elizabeth…but I’m pretty sure they didn’t get married. Glad you stopped by, Seph :)

  6. September 7, 2012 1:48 PM

    Wow, that was really good. I felt so sad for her.

    • September 7, 2012 10:54 PM

      I appreciate you reading it, Michael. It would be a sad situation, so I’m awfully glad it’s fiction.

  7. September 7, 2012 2:36 PM

    Excellent – wow “consoled, cajoled”.

    • September 7, 2012 10:55 PM

      Thanks, Kenya! I appreciate you stopping by to read my entry. (Your character makes a better choice by stepping away from the glass :) )

  8. September 7, 2012 3:28 PM

    Well that’s good. Elizabeth was a real witch anyway once you get to know her.

  9. September 7, 2012 3:45 PM

    i loved how you turned this into a poetic piece, and it all meshed together beautifully. it gave me a pang to read it.

    • September 7, 2012 11:02 PM

      Thanks, Renada. I tried to leave Trifecta’s wording in tact, but I didn’t have enough words to convey what I wanted to. I’m glad you enjoyed it :)

  10. September 7, 2012 4:38 PM

    This is lovely. The sunlight ‘grasping every available point of refraction’. Fantastic :)

  11. September 7, 2012 4:53 PM

    Oh so sad. But nicely written as usual. :-)

  12. September 7, 2012 5:49 PM

    Ah, this is terrific. Love the way you interpreted this.

  13. September 7, 2012 7:35 PM

    I am delighted with this FICTIONAL real life drama, Janna.

    Remind your husband as often as possible that YOU are a KEEPER! Elizabeth doesn’t stand a chance! ;)

    • September 7, 2012 11:08 PM

      I’m happy it’s fictional, too :) I’ll be sure to remind my husband daily about how awesome I am (like when I leave my dishes in the sink) – I’m sure he’ll agree!

  14. September 7, 2012 11:49 PM

    What a stunning interpretation. Beautiful, lonely, and sad with a backbone of steel, just like the lady left behind.

  15. September 8, 2012 2:57 AM

    Very nice.

  16. September 8, 2012 3:37 AM

    Yes, this is very sad. Beautifully written.

    • September 8, 2012 7:33 PM

      Maybe my next story won’t be such a downer…then again, maybe it will :) Thanks for reading, Lumdog!

  17. September 8, 2012 10:22 AM

    Sad, but lyrical. Perfect poetry!

  18. September 8, 2012 11:32 AM

    Very touching! :D

  19. September 8, 2012 12:00 PM

    JannaT, you consistently write the most beautiful pieces, and this one just serves to prove my point. Your use of language, today both yours and Trifecta’s, is truly masterful. Whether using thirty-three words or three hundred thirty-three, your characters come alive and touch the reader with their genuine humanity. We are able to identify, to empathize, to love or hate every character that you create. It is a joy and an inspiration to read your writing.
    Thank you for sharing it as often as you do,
    (And I, too, am glad this is fiction for you!)
    Excellent entry!
    Peace and light,
    Amy @BettyRanta

    • September 8, 2012 7:53 PM

      I am humbled by your praise, Betty. There are so many talented writers, and sometimes I struggle with doubt. Many of my stories are faith-based, and I know they won’t appeal to everyone, but as a writer, it’s a pleasure to know that my characters mean something to someone else.

      I’m glad you have enjoyed my stories. I appreciate you taking time to read them, and certainly for taking the time to share your thoughts :)

  20. September 8, 2012 7:59 PM

    Poignant, such depth of feeling imparted in such few words. Loved this Janna!

  21. September 8, 2012 8:55 PM

    nice flow. you incorporated it well.

  22. September 9, 2012 8:04 AM

    I really enjoyed how you broke down the lines even within themselves.
    And glass, I kept thinking window (and used it that way), you put in IN the hand. Perfect.

    • September 9, 2012 11:51 PM

      I’m glad you liked this one, Braintomahawk. I wanted to be true to the prompt and keep it in paragraph form, but this idea wouldn’t get out of my head!

  23. September 9, 2012 1:28 PM

    This is a fantastic poem :) It flowed so well :D

  24. September 10, 2012 7:47 AM

    Beautiful writing, Janna! You really make it look so easy. The words you choose bring so much eloquence to this sad story. (I sat out for this Trifextra, but I’m on my way to check out the new one for the week!)

    • September 11, 2012 7:38 AM

      I didn’t see a link for you, so I wondered. If I don’t get caught up better on blog reading, I may sit out the weekend one. The prompts are just so hard to resist, though :)

      Thanks for reading this one, I appreciate it!

Got an opinion? Share it!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 464 other followers

%d bloggers like this: